Taking the Toxic Out of Relationships

People are bad at relationships, let's be honest! They hold on to toxic relationships, whether it's a family member, work acquaintance, romantic relationship or friendship or any other type of relationship.  Toxic people hold us back, and make us feel as if we're the ones who are at fault. When in actuality we're not. 

Regardless of the type of relationship that it is, there's a few key things to keep in mind. When you are deciding whether or not that relationship works for you, that you should ask yourself. 

• Is the relationship one sided?  
• Does the relationship, bring you more stress and grief than positive things? 
• Is the person there for you, when you need them? 
• Are they jealous of your success? 
• Is the relationship give and take, or do they just take? 
• Do they respect your boundaries? 

These are important questions, because they determine the person's intentions and how much they value the actual relationship. 

Also making up excuses for the unhealthy relationship, regardless of the relationship type, causes you nothing but being stuck in the same situation. While reinforcing to the toxic individual, that it's ok to treat you like that. Saying things such as 

• But I love them 
• You can't control who you love 
• But I've known them for a long time 
• I'll have nothing if I leave them 
• But they're family, and you only have one family

Saying anything that you use to justify staying where you are, and disregarding and ignoring the things that you can change. Instead of proactively doing what you need to do to make sure that relationship is in your past, instead of constantly being a problem. In relationships, there is two aspects, what you can do and what you can't do. Understanding the difference and instead of making excuses for what you can't do, do what you can do in order to break unhealthy relationship patterns.